Jason Monastra

My life and thoughts out on the web

HOW TO INSTALL A HOME SECURITY SYSTEM 1. Go to a second-hand store and buy a pair of men’s used size 14-16work boots.   2. Place them on your front porch, along with a copy of Guns & AmmoMagazine. 3. Put a few giant dog dishes next to the boots and magazines. 4. Leave a note on your door that reads: Hey Bubba,  Me, Big Jim, Duke and Slim went for more ammunition. Back in an hour.Don’t mess with the pit bulls– they attacked the mailman this morningand messed him up real bad. I don’t think Killer took part in it butit was hard to tell from all the blood. Anyway, I locked all four of‘em in the house. Better wait outside. “Cooter”